Tuesday, April 27, 2010

I'm sorry

I've noticed lately that I substitute "excuse me" with "I'm sorry." I'm not sure when this started, but I do this quite a bit throughout the day. It's not even an appropriate saying for what I'm meaning. This is a habit I'm determined to break, there's no need for me to say "I'm sorry" when I'm reaching over someone to grab a straw.

I also noticed other women doing this. There’s no reason for us to be apologetic for trying to get somewhere or something. Is this something we’re taught? To apologize for no reason?

Monday, April 26, 2010

Weekend Recaps

I had a very random weekend. It started with happy hour with a few coworkers. I had to leave early because I promised Rachel that I would babysit some adults and chaperone the sorority formal. Last time we chaperoned together, we got to kick out three couples and see the DJ get tackled by an overly intoxicated date. This time the group just had several dance offs which in comparison is boring. So afterwards, around 11:00ish I rejoined my co-workers. The group slightly changed and you could definitely tell who had been there since 5:30pm. One co-worker kindly started kneading me with her head like a cat. I wasn’t sure how to react so I just petted her head told her she was a good kitty. The night progressed into karaoke version of baby got back where my co-worker who acted like a cat was stumbling into all the booty dancing female patrons. It was quite comical seeing her bounce between people rears like a pinball. As the night continued the group decided shots was obliviously a good idea. I ended up with a regurgitation of a jack shot from the same kitty/pinball coworker. That’s when my Friday night ended and I took her and my husband home.

Saturday started slow since we had a late night. I got my hair done and decided since its Spring I should go dark. I love it! I also booked a hair cut with my stylist who moved to Denver but comes back about once a month. Dave and I ended up going out for a low-key night of coffee with friends that turned into drinking games and riding in a van with shag carpeting, no seats and a small television in the back. It’s for sale if anyone needs a creepy kidnapping van.

I have a coworker who speaks Spanish and very little English. We try to have conversations, but they usually turn out with both of saying “Como se dice…” and since she doesn’t know English her word is in Spanish and I can’t help her and vice versa for me. Pretty hysterical if you’re eavesdropping on the conversation.

Happy Monday!

Thursday, April 22, 2010

At least have tinted windows

I know you've missed my work stories. This happened several weeks ago, but it was too funny not share. Fair warning you might find this vulgar.

It was a bright sunny day. I thought I had the chance to leave work relatively on time. It was a little after 5pm and our evening students were beginning to arrive for their classes. With my purse in hand I get up to head home. I get stopped by the stairs by two employees who were mumbling that they needed to tell me something. Both of their faces turn bright red and they won't look me in the eyes. Finally, one of them blurts out "a student is getting a bj in the parking lot." I naturally ask, "how do you know this?"

Apparently, this student was receiving his afternoon delight in his car without tinted windows. Another student called an instructor to report what he saw. The instructor was off campus so he called another instructor who was at the school. The instructor peeked out a window and confirmed what the student reported. The off campus instructor returned and pulled his car right up next to the love car. The girl jumps up so quickly that she bumps her head on the ceiling and the student is buttoning his pants as quickly as possible.

I got the pleasure of calling my very conservative Mormon male President and explain the situation. So of course using my most professional tact, I blurt out "a student is having oral sex in the parking lot.". This followed by a long awkward silence. He then tells me he's on the way over.

We met with the student and immediately expelled him. The student did not take this well. He stated that while it may have looked bad, his girlfriend was actually kissing his stomach. Then on the way out the door he turned to his instructor and said, "I hope you watch the ten o'clock news. That's where you'll see the report that my dad's killed me."

We have an appeal process and let the student back into school. And obiviously his dad didn't kill him. Lesson learned? Get tinted windows.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Why Get Married?

I had an interesting conversation last night. A co-worker and I started having a heated discussion about why people get married. I have learned from this discussion that this should be one of those topics people stay away from at parties, like politics and religion.

I don't remember how the conversation got started. What I do remember is her saying "Why get married when 50% get divorced and the other 50% are unhappy." This is about the time where I blew a gasket because I felt my relationship was being scrutinized. Had we both been sober, I think we could've had a calm conversation.

So, I'm going to give my reasons for why I think people get married.

1. Her argument was that 50% of marriages end in divorce, so why get married with a high failure rate.

I can't find actual data on this statistic, but I know this number is generally accepted among the public. I'm going to accept this number for simplicity reasons. I'm also going to assume that even though we do not have to register for every romantic relationship we have, more non-martial relationships end versus marriages ending in divorce. So if we're going to go with her argument of why get married if you have a 50% chance of getting divorce, why enter a relationship if you have a higher chance of it ending?

2. I want to wake up every day and have a choice with whom I’m with.

Let’s go back to the 50% of marriages ending in divorce. Doesn’t that mean that the other 50% are choosing to stay married? It’s still a choice regardless of the legal document or not. I know there out there who feel trapped in a relationship, married or not. Every day is a choice when you’re a relationship and both parties choose to stay together. That’s what makes a relationship.

3. I asked her why wouldn’t you get married? She responded why would I?

Because marriage is a ceremony where you stand up in front God, family and friends and make a verbal commitment to your partner. You become accountable for your relationship and the actions you take towards your partner. By making public vows, you’re saying you will respect and work with your partner. This is a public way of saying you're in a long-term committed relationship. If this is what you're seeking from your partner why wouldn't you get married?